Can you guys help me figure out who’s signature is who’s????
when someone at my 4th of july barbeque tries to stop me from fitting another firecracker into my ass
if you put “man” at the end of any sentence its AUTOMATICALLY platonic
"i love you, man."
"stay with me forever, man."
"fuck me hard in the ass, man."
this kid in my drama class said “i relate to loki on a personal level because we’re both adopted and yearn for world domination”
I’m in me mums womb
get out me womb
I just got a wrong number text from a stranger that said: “hey can we use ur pool there’s a moose in ours”
I’ve never received such a funny text in my life I can’t breathe
I told them “yes if you send a pic” & they sent me tHIS
Well did you let them use your pool?
Sounds like a plan >:D we have like at least an hour and a half until work on Friday. You have the TV and Netflix and I’ll bring the octopuses (octopi?). gaypoetsociety
Next time you come over. You. me. the human centipede and an occasional kinky use of an octopus gaypoetsociety
heck yeah bro. I’m holding you up to that. you can’t punk out now. I’m reading us on the best positions with an octopus. perfexoxotion